Firstly I have to say that its very nice of you guys to be so excited that my last post hit over 100 comments. ;) So sweet.
Anyhoo this quick post is to inform you on the following:
1. I've been taking it 'easy' over the past few days: going to the gym (its about time), Marie France-ing, and
2. A really good friend's bothe came to visit from Brisbane; so I've been taking him out a fair bit with some friends.
Its going to be a hectic week ahead: shoots Tuesday, Wed, Thurs and Friday from dusk till dawn. Then on the 2nd another shoot, followed by an entire month of July with ESPN work. :) Good lah, work = money. ;)
Watching the four episodes back to back of Heroes. Way cool. Wish I had powers... If I could chose... it'll brobably be Hiro's power of teleportation and freezing time. ;) Then I can go back and undo past mistakes, and stop my cats from knocking over expensive vases when I'm in the room. *hee hee* Oh and not to mention exams. I would be able to take my time for a change. I'm sure Faz will agree with me on this one.
What about you guys? What special powers would you like?
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
What Men Want...(this is Pt 1 as well. ;) )
Okay this is for all the ladies out there (I cant just cater to you guys, right?)
I first need to get the ground rules straight: If there's one thing I learnt as a girl in Singapore (and Malaysia), and being really good mates with guys for as long as I can remember... its this.
Guys are actually very simple creatures.
Don't overanalyse their actions, as most of the time, it is the simplest explanation that would be the truth.
Eg: He's not calling you.
Overanalysed answer to predicament: He must be busy, or he's playing 'the game' or he's gay.
Simple answer: He's just not interested enough to take the time to call you.
Explanation: If a guy's interested, he will ALWAYS make time to call, or text you at the very least. If he doesn't (replies the next time you see him with a "Oh darling, I'm sorry, I've been so busy!) - he's just not interested PERIOD. Cut your losses, and move on.
Okay now we're done with that, we can move on to a situation where the both of you have actually been on some dates.. or you're arranging to go on your first date, whatever. This guideline applies to Nice, Decent girls, who aren't out there to use a guy for materialistic ends, or who enjoy torturing them by playing with their feelings. If you're one of 'those' girls, I suggest you change your ways cause, babe, there's such a thing as Karma, and when it bites you in the ass, it never lets go.
What not to do.
1. Talk about your exes. If guys would have it their way, they'd like to be the first and only man in your life. But they know its not possible for your gorgeous being to have gone unnoticed for more than one and a half decades. Still, no need to remind them that you've been with other guys. And its not a nice way to 'hint' to him that you've been treated "so well" and that you have expectations on him *already*. Furthermore, its an indication that you're not over a certain ex (if you're constantly talking about him). If he asks, answer as vaguely as possible, and change he subject.
2. Talk about your faults, like you're warning him. The explanation of this is simple: Subconciously we humans (esp girls) like to point our flaws out before people notice them because then it'd be like 'its okay'. Eg. Girls saying, "omg I've put on so much weight lately" in the first five minutes of the conversation, or "sigh I dont know what to do, I overplucked my eyebrows!". Remember this, girls. You're sussing HIM out to be a potential partner, not the other way around. Men are happy to have any decent woman. If you talk about your bad spending habits, your personal hygiene and your allergy to deodrants, he's just going to run for the hills. "Faults" like that aren't first date conversations; its for him to find out about them as you get to know each other, and who knows; he might even accept you for who you are and love you for you.
3. Write him long emails. This goes both for "happy times" and "bad times". If you guys are doing great and you write him a "I love to be with you" email that's about 10 pages long, its very likely he'll freak out. Remember, men are simple creatures. Its amazing that guys even read this blog (methinks its the visuals that come with it, but oh well! ;) ) - and if you send him an email like that it will sound like you're expecting him to do the same for you. Which he wont like to feel pressured into. Worse still, if you're having a rough patch, or already broken up and you want to get him back, or if you're already over him and feel like sending 'one last email' for 'closure' - DON'T. I have been guilty of all of the above many many times, and its really no use. With simple creatures, actions speak louder than words and you don't need to SAY you're mad with him and list A-Z on why he's an inadequate guy, or that You're So Over Him Because .... . Doesn't need to be done. Just tell him he's an Ass, and walk away. Once you've cooled down, talk things out if you can. What I used to do is have a blog up, and rant (by writing poetry) on it. It was a hidden message to him, and he knew it. He'd never bring it up of course, but I know he got the message.
4. Which brings me on to the next, most important point. Never Ever Mention the "C" word. Commitment, that is. NEVER bring up the conversation about "Where's this going? Are we in a Committed relationship?"... That one guarunteeeeed will send him running. Fast. No looking back type of 1000 mile sprint. If he doesn't (lucky you), he'll still be really weary, which is not a good thing. Reason for this is simple: If he's still with you, taking you out on dates, its clear he likes you. Its clear he's into you. Simple minds dont think further than lunchtime tomorrow, so guys don't really think of "commitment" perse. Until it really hits them, and if you're the amazing person that I'm sure you are, he'll realise that sooner or later and HE'LL be the one to bring it up, not you. In the meantime, mimick his behaviour to a certain extent. If he wants to meet up on thursdays, but likes to spend time with his friends on Fridays, you do the same. Spend time with YOUR friends on Fridays. ;) (NB: This only applies to relationships younger than a year. If you guys have been dating for a year and its kind of the same as the first month, and he's not any better, you better start wondering if a) there's another woman, b) he's not secretly married, or c) he's mentally retarded and you're better off seeing someone else.)
5. Never bring him to meet your parents before he brings you to meet his. Explanation is simple, he'll feel pressured again. You must wait for him to make the first move towards any kind of "seriousness" in a relationship. (explanation above).
6. If you're dealing with a player: Don't try to change him. Never expressly try to change a man. If he's going to change (I believe people can), he'll do it without you asking. Pointing out his flaws only belittles him, and would make him stubborn. If you can accept it, try. If you cant, leave. Simple simple..
7. Dont play "the game". And by game I mean the "Oh i'm busy tonight, maybe i'll see you tomorrow, I'll call" - and you never call. Look, this is fine if you're dating a boy. But if you're dating a man, he wont appreciate this. Do, however, play it casual. "Oh drinks? Sure. I'll see ya later." If he asks you. BUT PLEASE REMEMBER: DO NOT wait for him. Eg; If he's supposed to call and make dinner plans, and you hear nothing by 6pm, go ahead with your own thing. If he calls last minute and you're busy doing something else, too bad. You don't need to drop everything for him and go running. This would teach him to call on time, and make and effort to attain your attention and time. Play it cool, but still show you're interested: "So sorry, I didn't hear from you and my friends asked me out. Why don't we do dinner tomorrow instead?" - and set the time, so there's no waiting for calls anymore. Or even better, ask him to join you. Or meet up later for drinks. :)
What To Do: (this, however does not apply to assholes. Guys like that you should just leave.)
1. Laugh, smile and be yourself. Really. If he's going to fall in love, he should fall in love with YOU.
2. Take pride in yourself, and how you look. No, I dont mean be a vainpot and take two hours to get ready all the time: But lets put it this way. We feel best about ourselves when we look our best. A little nail polish is always nice, a little lip gloss is always sweet. Just cause you've been dating for a couple of months doesnt mean that you don't need to shave your legs AT ALL, and that you can let that extra little moustache runneth over. Its true: if he loves you, he'll love you for you and a few extra pounds and a little hairgrowth wont matter. But on the way to that 'true love'-ness, he may need a little extra coaxing with the physical matter. ;) And honestly, I think that if a lady respects herself as a woman, would always find the time to trim her hair every few months, and exfoliate and give herself little facials. I always want to look my best when I can, because it makes me feel good. And that sort of positive energy is contagious, and very attractive.
3. Remember this quote from "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." (this also relates to my previous post) ~ "Men like thinking their the head. Let them. But we know it is the woman that is the neck: And the neck turns the head in any direction it wants..." So yes. Let the guy be the guy. With a little coaxing and sweet looking pouts, you could probably get him to do anything. Men in general want to please their woman, and to provide them with whatever they can. I'm not saying its okay to coax him into buying you that diamond necklace that's going to cost him a year's salary (that's just being mean, materialistic and .. well, mean.) A nice example of this would be, if dinner crops up, you can mention, "I hear there's that really nice restaurant at Clarke Quay, its supposed to be really good. I'd love to try it sometime. I think you'd like it too." ~ then the decision on where to eat will ultimately be his, but you've got your two cents in already. If your guy just goes, "Uh. McDonalds is nearer", it could be one of two things: Either you're dealing with a scrooge who hates spending money (can you accept that? refer to note above, no6), or he's just plain lazy. If its the second, you could always look at him, and say, "I'd really really like to try it, and it'd ake me so happy if you could take me there tonight.. " and smile smile kiss kiss. If he doesn't succumb to your sweetness, I can't help you already. :P
4. Understand him, or try your very best to. If he loves football, there's nothing you can do during the World Cup. And if he's a gamer, be prepared to lose him for a good 3 hours a day at least. Boys will be boys, I'm sure there's something you can do during that period of time that will take your mind off what a kid you're dealing with. ;) Trust me, he'll love you more for it.
5. Flirt with him. This applies if you've been with him for a month or years. Flirtation is always sexy, it never grows old. It helps to keep the relationship fresh, and guys will always fall for it. A little twinkle in your eye is all it needs to take your relationship back to where it began.
...I can't think of anything else you should do, really. Will update this list when it occurs to me. :)
I first need to get the ground rules straight: If there's one thing I learnt as a girl in Singapore (and Malaysia), and being really good mates with guys for as long as I can remember... its this.
Guys are actually very simple creatures.
Don't overanalyse their actions, as most of the time, it is the simplest explanation that would be the truth.
Eg: He's not calling you.
Overanalysed answer to predicament: He must be busy, or he's playing 'the game' or he's gay.
Simple answer: He's just not interested enough to take the time to call you.
Explanation: If a guy's interested, he will ALWAYS make time to call, or text you at the very least. If he doesn't (replies the next time you see him with a "Oh darling, I'm sorry, I've been so busy!) - he's just not interested PERIOD. Cut your losses, and move on.
Okay now we're done with that, we can move on to a situation where the both of you have actually been on some dates.. or you're arranging to go on your first date, whatever. This guideline applies to Nice, Decent girls, who aren't out there to use a guy for materialistic ends, or who enjoy torturing them by playing with their feelings. If you're one of 'those' girls, I suggest you change your ways cause, babe, there's such a thing as Karma, and when it bites you in the ass, it never lets go.
What not to do.
1. Talk about your exes. If guys would have it their way, they'd like to be the first and only man in your life. But they know its not possible for your gorgeous being to have gone unnoticed for more than one and a half decades. Still, no need to remind them that you've been with other guys. And its not a nice way to 'hint' to him that you've been treated "so well" and that you have expectations on him *already*. Furthermore, its an indication that you're not over a certain ex (if you're constantly talking about him). If he asks, answer as vaguely as possible, and change he subject.
2. Talk about your faults, like you're warning him. The explanation of this is simple: Subconciously we humans (esp girls) like to point our flaws out before people notice them because then it'd be like 'its okay'. Eg. Girls saying, "omg I've put on so much weight lately" in the first five minutes of the conversation, or "sigh I dont know what to do, I overplucked my eyebrows!". Remember this, girls. You're sussing HIM out to be a potential partner, not the other way around. Men are happy to have any decent woman. If you talk about your bad spending habits, your personal hygiene and your allergy to deodrants, he's just going to run for the hills. "Faults" like that aren't first date conversations; its for him to find out about them as you get to know each other, and who knows; he might even accept you for who you are and love you for you.
3. Write him long emails. This goes both for "happy times" and "bad times". If you guys are doing great and you write him a "I love to be with you" email that's about 10 pages long, its very likely he'll freak out. Remember, men are simple creatures. Its amazing that guys even read this blog (methinks its the visuals that come with it, but oh well! ;) ) - and if you send him an email like that it will sound like you're expecting him to do the same for you. Which he wont like to feel pressured into. Worse still, if you're having a rough patch, or already broken up and you want to get him back, or if you're already over him and feel like sending 'one last email' for 'closure' - DON'T. I have been guilty of all of the above many many times, and its really no use. With simple creatures, actions speak louder than words and you don't need to SAY you're mad with him and list A-Z on why he's an inadequate guy, or that You're So Over Him Because .... . Doesn't need to be done. Just tell him he's an Ass, and walk away. Once you've cooled down, talk things out if you can. What I used to do is have a blog up, and rant (by writing poetry) on it. It was a hidden message to him, and he knew it. He'd never bring it up of course, but I know he got the message.
4. Which brings me on to the next, most important point. Never Ever Mention the "C" word. Commitment, that is. NEVER bring up the conversation about "Where's this going? Are we in a Committed relationship?"... That one guarunteeeeed will send him running. Fast. No looking back type of 1000 mile sprint. If he doesn't (lucky you), he'll still be really weary, which is not a good thing. Reason for this is simple: If he's still with you, taking you out on dates, its clear he likes you. Its clear he's into you. Simple minds dont think further than lunchtime tomorrow, so guys don't really think of "commitment" perse. Until it really hits them, and if you're the amazing person that I'm sure you are, he'll realise that sooner or later and HE'LL be the one to bring it up, not you. In the meantime, mimick his behaviour to a certain extent. If he wants to meet up on thursdays, but likes to spend time with his friends on Fridays, you do the same. Spend time with YOUR friends on Fridays. ;) (NB: This only applies to relationships younger than a year. If you guys have been dating for a year and its kind of the same as the first month, and he's not any better, you better start wondering if a) there's another woman, b) he's not secretly married, or c) he's mentally retarded and you're better off seeing someone else.)
5. Never bring him to meet your parents before he brings you to meet his. Explanation is simple, he'll feel pressured again. You must wait for him to make the first move towards any kind of "seriousness" in a relationship. (explanation above).
6. If you're dealing with a player: Don't try to change him. Never expressly try to change a man. If he's going to change (I believe people can), he'll do it without you asking. Pointing out his flaws only belittles him, and would make him stubborn. If you can accept it, try. If you cant, leave. Simple simple..
7. Dont play "the game". And by game I mean the "Oh i'm busy tonight, maybe i'll see you tomorrow, I'll call" - and you never call. Look, this is fine if you're dating a boy. But if you're dating a man, he wont appreciate this. Do, however, play it casual. "Oh drinks? Sure. I'll see ya later." If he asks you. BUT PLEASE REMEMBER: DO NOT wait for him. Eg; If he's supposed to call and make dinner plans, and you hear nothing by 6pm, go ahead with your own thing. If he calls last minute and you're busy doing something else, too bad. You don't need to drop everything for him and go running. This would teach him to call on time, and make and effort to attain your attention and time. Play it cool, but still show you're interested: "So sorry, I didn't hear from you and my friends asked me out. Why don't we do dinner tomorrow instead?" - and set the time, so there's no waiting for calls anymore. Or even better, ask him to join you. Or meet up later for drinks. :)
What To Do: (this, however does not apply to assholes. Guys like that you should just leave.)
1. Laugh, smile and be yourself. Really. If he's going to fall in love, he should fall in love with YOU.
2. Take pride in yourself, and how you look. No, I dont mean be a vainpot and take two hours to get ready all the time: But lets put it this way. We feel best about ourselves when we look our best. A little nail polish is always nice, a little lip gloss is always sweet. Just cause you've been dating for a couple of months doesnt mean that you don't need to shave your legs AT ALL, and that you can let that extra little moustache runneth over. Its true: if he loves you, he'll love you for you and a few extra pounds and a little hairgrowth wont matter. But on the way to that 'true love'-ness, he may need a little extra coaxing with the physical matter. ;) And honestly, I think that if a lady respects herself as a woman, would always find the time to trim her hair every few months, and exfoliate and give herself little facials. I always want to look my best when I can, because it makes me feel good. And that sort of positive energy is contagious, and very attractive.
3. Remember this quote from "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." (this also relates to my previous post) ~ "Men like thinking their the head. Let them. But we know it is the woman that is the neck: And the neck turns the head in any direction it wants..." So yes. Let the guy be the guy. With a little coaxing and sweet looking pouts, you could probably get him to do anything. Men in general want to please their woman, and to provide them with whatever they can. I'm not saying its okay to coax him into buying you that diamond necklace that's going to cost him a year's salary (that's just being mean, materialistic and .. well, mean.) A nice example of this would be, if dinner crops up, you can mention, "I hear there's that really nice restaurant at Clarke Quay, its supposed to be really good. I'd love to try it sometime. I think you'd like it too." ~ then the decision on where to eat will ultimately be his, but you've got your two cents in already. If your guy just goes, "Uh. McDonalds is nearer", it could be one of two things: Either you're dealing with a scrooge who hates spending money (can you accept that? refer to note above, no6), or he's just plain lazy. If its the second, you could always look at him, and say, "I'd really really like to try it, and it'd ake me so happy if you could take me there tonight.. " and smile smile kiss kiss. If he doesn't succumb to your sweetness, I can't help you already. :P
4. Understand him, or try your very best to. If he loves football, there's nothing you can do during the World Cup. And if he's a gamer, be prepared to lose him for a good 3 hours a day at least. Boys will be boys, I'm sure there's something you can do during that period of time that will take your mind off what a kid you're dealing with. ;) Trust me, he'll love you more for it.
5. Flirt with him. This applies if you've been with him for a month or years. Flirtation is always sexy, it never grows old. It helps to keep the relationship fresh, and guys will always fall for it. A little twinkle in your eye is all it needs to take your relationship back to where it began.
...I can't think of anything else you should do, really. Will update this list when it occurs to me. :)
Friday, June 15, 2007
What Women Want...Pt 1
Last night I attended a lovely event by Style Magazine and Lush.fm... It was lots of fun, Thanks to Azzy, lovely lovely man. :) Met up with lots of old friends, uncluding David (Editor of FHM), met new girl Charmaine who will be joining Kosmic Films (my agency) sometime soon.
But that's now I'm going to talk about here.
This blog is dedicated to all you men out there who think you know what women want, keep playing "Mr. Nice Guy Who Is Super Romantic", and keep wondering why you never seem to be able to hold on to a girl for more than two months.
*ahem* So here goes. *Dims the lights, puts up slides ala powerpoint*
WOMEN WANT MEN TO BE MEN.
There's a reason why guys are guys and girls are girls. There's a reason why we can get away with miniskirts and you can't. When a woman is with a man, she wants the man to be the MAN in the relationship. Yes, give in to her when appropriate (like when she says she *really* wants to watch Ocean's 13, whereas you'd prefer to go ga-ga over Jessica Alba in Fantastic 4) ~ but always make it clear through your actions that you're the man in the relationship.
Never EVER (especially within the first year of your relationship):
1. Write poetry for her everynight in the first two months of your relationship.
2. Send her flowers more than once every six months (unless her birthday and valentines and your anniversary are around the same time)
3. Take her out on dates and shower her with gifts more than once a month.
4. Call her every moment of every day saying how much you love her and how the sun revolves around her.
5. Make a CD for her in the first month of your relationship so she'll know what songs make you go all soft when you think of her.
6. Tell her everyday that she's the only thing keeping you alive.
Now, the above list are things you shouldn't do on a regular basis. You *may* indulge in one or two of the above, one or twice a year TOPS, but any more than that she'll start expecting, and the moment you slip up, she'll bite your head off.
ALWAYS:
1. Assert your position as the man in the relationship. She wants to be led sometimes; i.e: No. I will NOT be going to your family dinner tonight for (enter legitimate reason here)
2. Lead her. E.g: When you walk into a room, go in first, lead her by the hand. Tell her what you'd rather do, instead of saying "Up to you, darlings-schumpkins". These little things make a difference.
3. Allow her to see that you will not stand for any form of disprespect to your status as her boyfriend. E.g: if she has a guy friend she freely hugs and kisses (on cheeks) and dances with at clubs when you're around, kick up a fuss. That sort of Public Friendly Display of Affection is fundamentally disrespectful towards you: What will people think of you as her boyfriend, standing right there, while she's dancing with some random guy who's been friends with her for a coupla years? *disregard this one if the guy is gay - but even that has limits sometimes*.
4. Now in no means does this allow you to be self centered and obnoxious. "Compensate" her by supporting her interests (her career, her hobbies) and actively look for ways to help her out in terms of it.
5. If she starts pulling the desperate "I'm depressed" tantrums (most of the time its to seek attention) - be there for her once or twice a month: listen, etc. But any more than that is just plain lame, you cannot allow the relationship to be all about her and her 'miserable life'. Tell her to strap up and face the real world: things cannot go her way always. Be logical when you explain this to her, not demeaning. She'll appreciate it.
6. Love her, but SHOW her you love her through discreet actions. You can say it, once in a while, but we all know actions speak louder than words. Buy her flowers (if you havent in the past four months), for no reason. Cook her dinner (three to four times a year). But always remember: treat her how you'd be treating her in ten years. Because if she's the one for you, she'll stay for the man you are inside. If not, you're going to be worshipping an ungrateful "Goddess" for two years before you get tired of it, and then she'll turn around and say, "You dont love me like you used to cause you dont help me put on my shoes anymore before we go out."
Bottom line is: If she wants a man, she'll go out with one. Men must act like men, and not like 'chicks' (poetry writing, flowers all the time). If she wanted all that, she'd turn lesbian.
I know this is an entirely dogmatic male perspective, and I realise that this may not work for everyone. This is simply what I have gathered through my own experiences in Singapore and Malaysia, and I would not like to claim any responsibility towards whatever negative reprocusions this advice may cause. ;) This is simply how I view relationships, and how I'd like to be treated.
What do y'all think though?
But that's now I'm going to talk about here.
This blog is dedicated to all you men out there who think you know what women want, keep playing "Mr. Nice Guy Who Is Super Romantic", and keep wondering why you never seem to be able to hold on to a girl for more than two months.
*ahem* So here goes. *Dims the lights, puts up slides ala powerpoint*
WOMEN WANT MEN TO BE MEN.
There's a reason why guys are guys and girls are girls. There's a reason why we can get away with miniskirts and you can't. When a woman is with a man, she wants the man to be the MAN in the relationship. Yes, give in to her when appropriate (like when she says she *really* wants to watch Ocean's 13, whereas you'd prefer to go ga-ga over Jessica Alba in Fantastic 4) ~ but always make it clear through your actions that you're the man in the relationship.
Never EVER (especially within the first year of your relationship):
1. Write poetry for her everynight in the first two months of your relationship.
2. Send her flowers more than once every six months (unless her birthday and valentines and your anniversary are around the same time)
3. Take her out on dates and shower her with gifts more than once a month.
4. Call her every moment of every day saying how much you love her and how the sun revolves around her.
5. Make a CD for her in the first month of your relationship so she'll know what songs make you go all soft when you think of her.
6. Tell her everyday that she's the only thing keeping you alive.
Now, the above list are things you shouldn't do on a regular basis. You *may* indulge in one or two of the above, one or twice a year TOPS, but any more than that she'll start expecting, and the moment you slip up, she'll bite your head off.
ALWAYS:
1. Assert your position as the man in the relationship. She wants to be led sometimes; i.e: No. I will NOT be going to your family dinner tonight for (enter legitimate reason here)
2. Lead her. E.g: When you walk into a room, go in first, lead her by the hand. Tell her what you'd rather do, instead of saying "Up to you, darlings-schumpkins". These little things make a difference.
3. Allow her to see that you will not stand for any form of disprespect to your status as her boyfriend. E.g: if she has a guy friend she freely hugs and kisses (on cheeks) and dances with at clubs when you're around, kick up a fuss. That sort of Public Friendly Display of Affection is fundamentally disrespectful towards you: What will people think of you as her boyfriend, standing right there, while she's dancing with some random guy who's been friends with her for a coupla years? *disregard this one if the guy is gay - but even that has limits sometimes*.
4. Now in no means does this allow you to be self centered and obnoxious. "Compensate" her by supporting her interests (her career, her hobbies) and actively look for ways to help her out in terms of it.
5. If she starts pulling the desperate "I'm depressed" tantrums (most of the time its to seek attention) - be there for her once or twice a month: listen, etc. But any more than that is just plain lame, you cannot allow the relationship to be all about her and her 'miserable life'. Tell her to strap up and face the real world: things cannot go her way always. Be logical when you explain this to her, not demeaning. She'll appreciate it.
6. Love her, but SHOW her you love her through discreet actions. You can say it, once in a while, but we all know actions speak louder than words. Buy her flowers (if you havent in the past four months), for no reason. Cook her dinner (three to four times a year). But always remember: treat her how you'd be treating her in ten years. Because if she's the one for you, she'll stay for the man you are inside. If not, you're going to be worshipping an ungrateful "Goddess" for two years before you get tired of it, and then she'll turn around and say, "You dont love me like you used to cause you dont help me put on my shoes anymore before we go out."
Bottom line is: If she wants a man, she'll go out with one. Men must act like men, and not like 'chicks' (poetry writing, flowers all the time). If she wanted all that, she'd turn lesbian.
I know this is an entirely dogmatic male perspective, and I realise that this may not work for everyone. This is simply what I have gathered through my own experiences in Singapore and Malaysia, and I would not like to claim any responsibility towards whatever negative reprocusions this advice may cause. ;) This is simply how I view relationships, and how I'd like to be treated.
What do y'all think though?
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Mandalay Function (Mr & Mrs Sin's Anniversary)
Yep. Remember the function I went to that I said the pics would come in a month? Yes..it was *this* dress I experienced a Janet Jackson moment in... lol.
Miss Malaysia World 2006 - Miss Emmiliene Ng and myself.
Yam-Seng-ing at the Dinner, to Mr. and Mrs. Sin's 16th year anniversary.
Anita Sarawak was the host for the night, we were all clearly entertained..
Stepped outside for a breather, only to take pictures with Mr. Lewre, and my AWESOME designer Mr. Jovian Mandagie (who also designed the other dress in this picture)
More Pictures! This time with Lina Onn, Malaysia's top Radio DJ. Talk about girl power, man.. she's won the awards like 8 times in a row or something crazy like that.
Candid shot. I'm happy my arms were positioned where they are..
Myself and Yummy Mummy-to-be Daphne Iking. 
Again, very aptly placed Red Table Ornament makes this picture post-able... ;) Well, that's it for now really. Hope you guys enjoy these pictures, cause they were such a pain in the neck to load up!!! ;)
Monday, June 11, 2007
Reflection
Yes, I'm happy, overjoyed that Rafa won the French Open. But i'd like to shift the focus here to Federer.
World No.1 for almost three years now, Federer has won every Grand Slam safe for the French Open. He's always been stopped short by the King of Clay, Nadal.
Federer has been hailed to be one of the most successful and ingenious tennis players to date - and all he wants right now is to win the French Open. He has never lifted that trophy, he has never planted his lips on the cup. Yesterday Roger walked away with his runner's up plate tucked under his arm like a newspaper.
"You can't win them all... But, honestly, what more can (he)we ask for?"
- Roger Federer's dad, on his son losing the French Open the third time in a row to Rafael Nadal, 6-3, 4-6, 6-4, 6-3.-
I guess this shows that even the mightiest giant has an achilles heel, even the biggest champ may fall. No one's invincible, and we should never think that we are the best at what we do, as there is always someone out there better.
Fundamentally though, I think this also shows that no matter how much success a man attains, he may never truly be happy. If there is that one thing he desires, it may be the thing that he may never achieve and it is because of THAT he desires it more.
Just my two cents.
Okay enough rambling this Sunday morning. ;)
Just to let y'all know, I watched the match last night at a friend's place, he's half Swiss so he was cheering for Federer, and needless to say we were trash-talking throughout the match. lol! It was good fun, cant wait for next year.
And I do apologise, yes I was busy with the LTD auditions yesterday. It was lots of fun (as per usual) and I will be looking forward to the first episode, on the 9th of August (immediately after National Day parade).
Today I'll be getting interviewed by Female Magazine, for their August Issue cover. yep, I'll be on the issue of Female Mag in August! *big smile* .. just last year I was *nominated* as one of Female Mag's Top 50 Most Gorgeous, .. and this year I'm on the cover. Its almost surreal, how quickly everything's going for me. I'm so thankful, and so blessed to be where I am right now.
Take care, God Bless and have a wonderful week ahead. :)
World No.1 for almost three years now, Federer has won every Grand Slam safe for the French Open. He's always been stopped short by the King of Clay, Nadal.
Federer has been hailed to be one of the most successful and ingenious tennis players to date - and all he wants right now is to win the French Open. He has never lifted that trophy, he has never planted his lips on the cup. Yesterday Roger walked away with his runner's up plate tucked under his arm like a newspaper.
"You can't win them all... But, honestly, what more can (he)we ask for?"
- Roger Federer's dad, on his son losing the French Open the third time in a row to Rafael Nadal, 6-3, 4-6, 6-4, 6-3.-
I guess this shows that even the mightiest giant has an achilles heel, even the biggest champ may fall. No one's invincible, and we should never think that we are the best at what we do, as there is always someone out there better.
Fundamentally though, I think this also shows that no matter how much success a man attains, he may never truly be happy. If there is that one thing he desires, it may be the thing that he may never achieve and it is because of THAT he desires it more.
Just my two cents.
Okay enough rambling this Sunday morning. ;)
Just to let y'all know, I watched the match last night at a friend's place, he's half Swiss so he was cheering for Federer, and needless to say we were trash-talking throughout the match. lol! It was good fun, cant wait for next year.
And I do apologise, yes I was busy with the LTD auditions yesterday. It was lots of fun (as per usual) and I will be looking forward to the first episode, on the 9th of August (immediately after National Day parade).
Today I'll be getting interviewed by Female Magazine, for their August Issue cover. yep, I'll be on the issue of Female Mag in August! *big smile* .. just last year I was *nominated* as one of Female Mag's Top 50 Most Gorgeous, .. and this year I'm on the cover. Its almost surreal, how quickly everything's going for me. I'm so thankful, and so blessed to be where I am right now.
Take care, God Bless and have a wonderful week ahead. :)
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Lets talk about my weight, shall we? ;)
"Anonymous said...
Hey andrea i heard you had to ask the people at the 8 days shoot to photoshop the flabs and rolls off your stomach! Hahaha and not forgetting all those stretch marks! Long live the dugong!!
June 7, 2007 3:19 PM "
Dear Friends,
As we can see, I've managed to get myself some detractors. But I'll not remove their posts as I have nothing to hide - you guys can judge for yourselves. Its true I was 'bigger' before - I'm only human and I worked hard to overcome it - both mentally and physically.
There's nothing I can do about the past - I'm just looking forward. In fact, I'm thankful to have my history: it makes me appreciate things so much more now. I have 'been there' and 'done that' in terms of my weight: and I know what every other female in a similar situation is going through. In a way I think that makes me more 'real' even.
But anyway, here's the story:
My mother was Miss Malaysia Univese 1970: and as I admired her so much I always wanted to emulate her. On a whim I joined Miss Malaysia Universe; even though I was well aware that I did not have a model's body. I was just an ordinary everday teenager. When I won, the judges said that it was because I had a personality and charisma that reflected very well on Malaysia, and that was more important to them than sending a lady who may be skinny but inefficient in other areas. I didn't expect what happened to me in the press in Malaysia; all they were focusing on was how I wasn't the stereotypical Kate Moss.
When Marie France approached me to undergo their treatments, I saw it as a great opportunity to slim down the right way. Then everything happened so fast after that - FHM covers etc; I was SO overwhelmed when FHM Malaysia chose ME to be on their 100th Issue as the covergirl.
Female Magazine Singapore at around the same time nomimated me to be Top 50 Most Gorgeous in Singapore, which I won 'most photogenic' and 'best catwalk' for. That was cool. ;)
I don't know why people are attacking me now but I guess that comes with the territory, eh? ;)
I can assure you that what you see with me is what you get - 8 Days is all me (as is FHM) :) and I'm not sure how you can have flab AND stretch marks but I guess that just goes to show how untrue 'anonymous's' statement is.
What matters most to me now is that I've done it the right way - through hard work and perseverance. And people may say what they wish: They cant take anything away from me. I hope people will appreciate and focus on the work that I done that has brough me to this point, it's been hard but hopefully women out there with that might be unhappy with their weight can look at what I've been through for inspiration. That would make it all worthwhile.
Hey andrea i heard you had to ask the people at the 8 days shoot to photoshop the flabs and rolls off your stomach! Hahaha and not forgetting all those stretch marks! Long live the dugong!!
June 7, 2007 3:19 PM "
Dear Friends,
As we can see, I've managed to get myself some detractors. But I'll not remove their posts as I have nothing to hide - you guys can judge for yourselves. Its true I was 'bigger' before - I'm only human and I worked hard to overcome it - both mentally and physically.
There's nothing I can do about the past - I'm just looking forward. In fact, I'm thankful to have my history: it makes me appreciate things so much more now. I have 'been there' and 'done that' in terms of my weight: and I know what every other female in a similar situation is going through. In a way I think that makes me more 'real' even.
But anyway, here's the story:
My mother was Miss Malaysia Univese 1970: and as I admired her so much I always wanted to emulate her. On a whim I joined Miss Malaysia Universe; even though I was well aware that I did not have a model's body. I was just an ordinary everday teenager. When I won, the judges said that it was because I had a personality and charisma that reflected very well on Malaysia, and that was more important to them than sending a lady who may be skinny but inefficient in other areas. I didn't expect what happened to me in the press in Malaysia; all they were focusing on was how I wasn't the stereotypical Kate Moss.
When Marie France approached me to undergo their treatments, I saw it as a great opportunity to slim down the right way. Then everything happened so fast after that - FHM covers etc; I was SO overwhelmed when FHM Malaysia chose ME to be on their 100th Issue as the covergirl.
Female Magazine Singapore at around the same time nomimated me to be Top 50 Most Gorgeous in Singapore, which I won 'most photogenic' and 'best catwalk' for. That was cool. ;)
I don't know why people are attacking me now but I guess that comes with the territory, eh? ;)
I can assure you that what you see with me is what you get - 8 Days is all me (as is FHM) :) and I'm not sure how you can have flab AND stretch marks but I guess that just goes to show how untrue 'anonymous's' statement is.
What matters most to me now is that I've done it the right way - through hard work and perseverance. And people may say what they wish: They cant take anything away from me. I hope people will appreciate and focus on the work that I done that has brough me to this point, it's been hard but hopefully women out there with that might be unhappy with their weight can look at what I've been through for inspiration. That would make it all worthwhile.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
I'm in Love.
With Rafael Nadal. ;)
And I may just make an excuse for him regarding my rules regarding dating younger men: Nadal just turned 21.
He's tall, He's dark and he has an amazing forehand. What more could a woman ask for?? *laughs*
On to more serious things though; I'm really happy Nadal beat Hewitt in the French Open. Hewitt dumped his then fiance Kim Kllijsters for some Aussie model (who only chased after him when he got rich and famous btw). Men like that cannot forgive.
See? Karma. Hewitt has never returned to world #1 in men's tennis since he did that. Nyeh! :P Nadal moves on to the quarter finals, lets hope he goes all the way! :)
On to more cheerful things, have you guys checked out 8 days yet? Lol! I'm quite happy with it, in general the pictures were really nicely done. Much thanks to the people behind the scenes, Stylist: Fan Fang, Hairstylist: Jasper and Make-up Artist Jasmine. So now all of you know who the other two girls are! ;) They look pretty good eh? No wonder Adrian loves his job. Which pictures are your favourites? ;)
I am feeling better now, thanks all for your concern. I am still coughing but its bearable.
As for the comments on "champion" I trust all of you realise it was made in jest and toungue-in-cheek ~ with reference to my line of Champion Dogs. I did mention that I handle my men like I do my dogs. Firmly. hehe.. so the comment on 'What sort of guy' I would like was also in that line. :) But I must say, men who are good in their chosen fields ('Champions' in their on right) and those with unwavering perseverance, are very VERY attractive to me...
Anyhoo. Enough talking about my men. Gotta answer a few emails before I head off for a casting my modelling agency is sending me to. Its for a Skin Whitening ad. *sigh* I already called them up to nicely informed them I'M TANNED and this would be a waste of my time...but apparently 'I'm the Japanese Client's Fav.' and 'They really wanna see you.' ... If this casting is another waste of time silly thingiemajiggie, I will be very aggigtated. Its at 3.30, then after that I need to go home, and get ready for that Movie Gala Premiere thing tonight. Sigh. And I have nothing to wear. :(
OH! And I managed to get my paws on *one* of the pictures of me at the event in Malaysia. (yes... it was THIS dress I had a wardrobe malfunction with...)
THAT's Mrs. Sin. ;)
And I may just make an excuse for him regarding my rules regarding dating younger men: Nadal just turned 21.
He's tall, He's dark and he has an amazing forehand. What more could a woman ask for?? *laughs*
On to more serious things though; I'm really happy Nadal beat Hewitt in the French Open. Hewitt dumped his then fiance Kim Kllijsters for some Aussie model (who only chased after him when he got rich and famous btw). Men like that cannot forgive.
See? Karma. Hewitt has never returned to world #1 in men's tennis since he did that. Nyeh! :P Nadal moves on to the quarter finals, lets hope he goes all the way! :)
On to more cheerful things, have you guys checked out 8 days yet? Lol! I'm quite happy with it, in general the pictures were really nicely done. Much thanks to the people behind the scenes, Stylist: Fan Fang, Hairstylist: Jasper and Make-up Artist Jasmine. So now all of you know who the other two girls are! ;) They look pretty good eh? No wonder Adrian loves his job. Which pictures are your favourites? ;)
I am feeling better now, thanks all for your concern. I am still coughing but its bearable.
As for the comments on "champion" I trust all of you realise it was made in jest and toungue-in-cheek ~ with reference to my line of Champion Dogs. I did mention that I handle my men like I do my dogs. Firmly. hehe.. so the comment on 'What sort of guy' I would like was also in that line. :) But I must say, men who are good in their chosen fields ('Champions' in their on right) and those with unwavering perseverance, are very VERY attractive to me...
Anyhoo. Enough talking about my men. Gotta answer a few emails before I head off for a casting my modelling agency is sending me to. Its for a Skin Whitening ad. *sigh* I already called them up to nicely informed them I'M TANNED and this would be a waste of my time...but apparently 'I'm the Japanese Client's Fav.' and 'They really wanna see you.' ... If this casting is another waste of time silly thingiemajiggie, I will be very aggigtated. Its at 3.30, then after that I need to go home, and get ready for that Movie Gala Premiere thing tonight. Sigh. And I have nothing to wear. :(
OH! And I managed to get my paws on *one* of the pictures of me at the event in Malaysia. (yes... it was THIS dress I had a wardrobe malfunction with...)
THAT's Mrs. Sin. ;)
Monday, June 4, 2007
Monday Blues
Hey Everyone,
First of all, thank you to Gab, and Pathfinder for coming to the LTD Auditions. :) It was very sweet for you guys to show your support like that - I really appreciate it.
Wish I was feeling better though.
Yesterday and the day before just sucked the life out of me. What's worse is that I was not able to fall asleep alst night until midnight - and I had to wake up at 4am this morning. I'm feeling woozy and sick, but at leat I have my voice. ;) I think I might be coming down with something, either that or I just really need a good day's rest.
I have a really long day today summore. :( I have a fitting and a meeting which wont allow me to go home until 6pm. I forced myself to eat something this morning, but I think all I need is some good rest, really.
Don't worry y'all. I'll be fine. :) I only have ESPN tomorrow morning again then I wont be having it for a while. On Thursday I'm going to lay in bed until noon. :D Oh just thinking of that makes me smile.. heeheehee.
You guys take care, and once again, thanks for all your advice and support. :)
First of all, thank you to Gab, and Pathfinder for coming to the LTD Auditions. :) It was very sweet for you guys to show your support like that - I really appreciate it.
Wish I was feeling better though.
Yesterday and the day before just sucked the life out of me. What's worse is that I was not able to fall asleep alst night until midnight - and I had to wake up at 4am this morning. I'm feeling woozy and sick, but at leat I have my voice. ;) I think I might be coming down with something, either that or I just really need a good day's rest.
I have a really long day today summore. :( I have a fitting and a meeting which wont allow me to go home until 6pm. I forced myself to eat something this morning, but I think all I need is some good rest, really.
Don't worry y'all. I'll be fine. :) I only have ESPN tomorrow morning again then I wont be having it for a while. On Thursday I'm going to lay in bed until noon. :D Oh just thinking of that makes me smile.. heeheehee.
You guys take care, and once again, thanks for all your advice and support. :)
Saturday, June 2, 2007
What A Day
As promised, here's a picture of my Fat Cat Skit. Demi's picture will be on my next post. ;)
I've been informed that I'm not allowed to blog on LTD. Sorry Boss(es).
Okay anyway I will comment on a few things somewhat related but not really.
1. My feet hurt.
2. Sore throat getting better, partly because of...
3. One of you cheeky fellas sneaked up on me and gave me a packet of Strepsils! Thanks so much! :) That's definitely going up on my "Sweetest things anyone has ever done for me" list, right next to buying me flowers, but still just under 'waking me up with Starbucks." ;) But its up there!! :)
I really have no energy right now, so this will be a short one. Tomorrow I have to work as well, as I will have to on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday... lets see. I've got Two photoshoots, One fitting, Two ESPN morning days (mon and tues) and... one gala movie premiere thing to go for. Thats all from Monday to Wednesday. Thurs and Fri are free for now, so here's a note to my Manager if you're reading this..
RICHMOND PLEASE GIVE ME A BREAK I NEED A BREAK PLEASE LET ME HAVE THURSDAY AND FRIDAY OFF CAUSE IF I HAVE TO WORK ON THOSE DAYS AS WELL I THINK I'LL GO CRAZY PLEASE LET ME OFF I REALLY NEED TO SLEEP PAST 9AM SOMETIMES....thank you...
Andrea Fonseka. Over and (knocked)Out.
Friday, June 1, 2007
I'm too sexy for my voice...
"I'm too sexy for my voice,
Too sexy for my voice,
Its gonna leave me..."
(sung in tune of "I'm too sexy" by that Village People Policeman look-alike guy)
For those of you who tuned in to the 6am Caltex Score Today, I sincerely apologise for sounding like an, er, adult telephone line receptionist. This was what happened:
I only realised that I lost my voice at approximately 10pm last night, when I tried to call my cats to be fed. I thought it was just my throat acting up, but when it didn't come back within half an hour I started panicking.
So I called my manager, asked him what I should do... and in the mean time I tried to get the numbers of the other Score Today presenters, and the ESPN lady whom I normally liase with. No one picks up except Jamie Yeo who's recording something in the UK. That was an interesting conversation though I tried to tell her who I was in my voice-less state. I think I freaked her out so I just hung up and texted her.
Anyhoo - so I only get a few hours of sleep throughout the night as I'm coughing half the time, and I wake up and come into work in time for the first Score Today. My producers are currently waiting for the replacement (Debbie) to come in, but I'll be staying here in the mean time should she not get here before the 8am live shoot.
What the hell did I do that was so stressful yesterday lah? I also dont know. All I did was: Get a foor massage, get a head massage, got my full body massage + hot wax wrap, did the groceries, bought some catlitter, and watch tv!! I didn't even meet up with anyone, I just relished in the joy of having *nothing* to do. And a few hours later, I lost my voice. Sheesh.
How la. Tomorrow is the toa pa yoh auditions. How am I going to get well enough to be talking the whole day. :(
So yes. No coffee, as its heaty. I'm finally going to the doctor later this morning, I'll be dropping by my Uni, then from 5-7pm I have an event that I had promised to attend. Will be talking as little as I can in all of them.
...a latte would be sooooo good right now.
Too sexy for my voice,
Its gonna leave me..."
(sung in tune of "I'm too sexy" by that Village People Policeman look-alike guy)
For those of you who tuned in to the 6am Caltex Score Today, I sincerely apologise for sounding like an, er, adult telephone line receptionist. This was what happened:
I only realised that I lost my voice at approximately 10pm last night, when I tried to call my cats to be fed. I thought it was just my throat acting up, but when it didn't come back within half an hour I started panicking.
So I called my manager, asked him what I should do... and in the mean time I tried to get the numbers of the other Score Today presenters, and the ESPN lady whom I normally liase with. No one picks up except Jamie Yeo who's recording something in the UK. That was an interesting conversation though I tried to tell her who I was in my voice-less state. I think I freaked her out so I just hung up and texted her.
Anyhoo - so I only get a few hours of sleep throughout the night as I'm coughing half the time, and I wake up and come into work in time for the first Score Today. My producers are currently waiting for the replacement (Debbie) to come in, but I'll be staying here in the mean time should she not get here before the 8am live shoot.
What the hell did I do that was so stressful yesterday lah? I also dont know. All I did was: Get a foor massage, get a head massage, got my full body massage + hot wax wrap, did the groceries, bought some catlitter, and watch tv!! I didn't even meet up with anyone, I just relished in the joy of having *nothing* to do. And a few hours later, I lost my voice. Sheesh.
How la. Tomorrow is the toa pa yoh auditions. How am I going to get well enough to be talking the whole day. :(
So yes. No coffee, as its heaty. I'm finally going to the doctor later this morning, I'll be dropping by my Uni, then from 5-7pm I have an event that I had promised to attend. Will be talking as little as I can in all of them.
...a latte would be sooooo good right now.
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